There is an incredible power in the act of finally, fully showing up for yourself, and committing yourself to your vision.
It is so much more than meets the eye, because a “vision” is just a code word for the things we really want in life. It is different things at different times, and it’s unique for every person. But the act of taking a stand for those things, is actually an act of recognition and acceptance. And the ripple effect of that act, is massive and truly immeasurable.
I had to get honest with myself recently, and see that although I thought I had always been truly committed, the reality is that I was still pretty wishy-washy on the inside, holding back, and playing it very safe… afraid that really committing, or “coming out” with what I truly wanted, would close doors, or shut-out options, or even get me stuck in a place I don’t want to be.
But when I finally realized I was already stuck in a place I didn’t want to be, and there were already closed doors all around me, I finally understood that I really had nothing to lose—because what I was afraid of losing, I already didn’t have.
» Afraid of losing total security?? Never had it.
» Afraid of losing total unwavering approval of all people?? Never had it.
» Afraid of risking absolute safety and never-ending stability?? Never had it.
» Afraid of looking like someone who doesn’t have it all completely figured out and does nothing but win-win-win at every single thing she undertakes? Ummm, yah, NEVER had it. 😀
It turns out I was gambling with monopoly money.
I was putting up fronts I didn’t really have…
So I called my own bluff.
And I went ALL IN.
Not because I was unafraid (because losing the illusion of safety sucks pretty much just as hard as the real thing), but because the alternative finally became unbearable. Just unbearable enough for me to finally ante-up, and throw in all my chips.
This is metaphorical of course, and it’s different things we’re committing at different times, on different levels, with different ratios of fear and discomfort… but the root of it is that you’re breaking out of the comforts of your “known” and trying something new. And new can ONLY beget new. The results cannot be exactly the same, because you are not—as Albert Einstein put it—doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result. (i.e. insanity)
Truly committing to your wants and needs is an act of love & recognition.
It’s the end of denial. It’s a symbolic stand that you’re taking—you’re becoming the hero of your own desires. You stop expecting someone, or something else to come and save you… some person, some client, some job, some group or some relationship…and you start saving yourself. You start being the one you can trust to look out for what you need, instead of waiting for someone else to magically guess what that is, agree with it, and deliver. Turns out… it’s not their job! (I know, whodda thunk?!)
It’s as if you say to your wants and needs: “hey, I SEE YOU. I know some people think you’re awkward, and nuts, and don’t like you that much — but I totally love you, and I’ve got your back.”
It’s as if we finally stop bailing on ourselves.
We finally become someone we can count on.
How on earth could we do that before when we were wishy-washy? When the slightest disapproval, or fear, or conflict would send us running for the hills? Pretending like our needs are total strangers and turning our backs on them – “who them? those aren’t mine! must be somebody else’s!”
But a funny thing happens when you step up to the plate in this way… when you take a stand for yourself and stop waiting to be saved…you find out you’re not alone in it. Ironically, that is the place you find more heroes than you know what to do with, because you finally see how it’s nothing BUT heroes everywhere… all trying to save their own day.
By committing to our own needs, we free others up to commit to theirs…
we stop wasting time and energy trying to convince eachother of the rightness or wrongness of our individual goals and desires for ourselves, and as a result we are actually available to support eachother in that — x 10. How sweet is that!?
It doesn’t mean everything’s guaranteed to turn out peachy. It just means that you stop pretending you don’t have wants and needs, and that it’s anyone else’s job ,or path in life, to explore those things and go after them. You start really owning them… and that’s when truly amazing things happen.
So, dig deep and ask what’s something that you’re waiting for a hero on?
What’s one thing that you’re waiting for some kind of permission to commit to?
And what’s one way, however small, that you can
put a ring on that, today? 😉