I have something to admit… prior to now, I have never invested in my business. Other than getting the practical immediate tools that I needed to do the job, I never invested anything in my business other than my blood, sweat, and tears, as they say. I went it alone, I did everything myself, I took the weight of the world on my shoulders and was determined to get the rewards of self employment and business ownership, without the risk.
It was a very lonely place to live.
What I thought was saving me from risk of financial ruin, what I thought was keeping me safe, was the very same thing that was keeping me from growing… from making connections that would fill my life and work with more ease and joy than ever before… from feeling truly supported and confident in what I do.
It turned out the ‘safety’ wasn’t protecting me from failure,
it was protecting me from success.
Success means different things to different people, but to me it means to be able to do what I love, and be who I am, and live how I live, and be supported in that. What I missed by staying safe was the ability to experience anything outside that safety zone, which meant the ability to experience anything DIFFERENT than my current reality at all. We all know this in theory, but rarely in practice, because change is frankly HARD and scary sh*t, I know.
Business owners tend to be fiercely independent creatures, which is wonderful and allows us to move mountains when we set our minds to it, but it also makes us have an extremely hard time reaching out for, or trusting, any help.
But the real loss in that, and the thing nobody really ever talks about as a cost of doing it all yourself, is what a lonely place it can be to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders, and never risk allowing in support. Ironically, it is the very thing that keeps us from actually experiencing the ease, and feeling of being held and fully supported that we were working so hard for in the first place.
We are asking our clients and customers to do that, and we aren’t even willing to do it ourselves! But none of this can fly for long. It’s a candle wick that’s burning down, and sooner or later there’ll be nothing left to burn… so the flame goes out.
Risk may be scary, but the consequences of not risking are far scarier than that. You might fail, but the risk of failure is there in either case, no matter WHAT…
so what can you gain by listening to the still, and often quieter voice of your heart? The one that knows it will not find joy locked away in a box, and kept under lock and key? The voice that knows that you are, and always were, a wild thing…
and wild things cannot be tamed.
Because they know full-well there’s no real safety anyway,
so they may as well light up the dark.
Making big leaps, trusting and taking risks does not mean just ignoring practicalities and realities, it just means honestly asking yourself what the reality may be if you don’t take any risks, and what the realities may be if you do: and then deciding for yourself what you are willing to live with.
Whatever path you choose, just listen to the call of your heart…
you can trust that. Because even when it doesn’t work out,
you’re still blooming.